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The title says it all. For the 1st tme in 2yrs, I feel intensely burnt-out. Unmotivated, fatigued, dispirited, yet totally indolent to do anytink. All of a sudden, all the shite abt nos, transport etc, seems to be taking a toll on mi. Huge, huge toll. This bodes realli bad signs, and I am perfectly aware of it. Yet all I ever did was to harp on it; making absolutely no constructive changes to the state of things. I dread mornings these days, cos it signifies gg to work. I dread 9-6.30pm, cos I duno hw the hell to occupy my time. Of all, I dread myself the most. Cos I noe the underlying problem has notink to do wif anytink else but wif myself. Yes, all the fuck i know is to rant non-stop. That's precisely why I said I am the root cause of it all. I am my own adversary. What do I really want? |
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