I had a long convo wif Li when she dialed me from Abu Dhabi tdy. Spoke abt a number of issues but mainly on the same issue, same topic. Actually, as a matter of fact; same person. N it dawned on me that we used to tok abt this issue 3yrs ago. At that time, she was in UK instead.
Time had flew by rapidly. Many things had changed within this period. Yet, Im still stuck in the same rut, bothered by the same issue. Y izizt humans nv learn from previous heartache n pain? Or maybe it's me who is too stubborn or too foolish for any changes?
Anyhow, i was reading thru some old entries and came across this particular one.
How true. But it's apparent the words did not sink into my head. Not deep enuff to deter me from making the damn same mistake. N yes, what a pity it is. So I have no one else to blame but myself.
I know there's a blue horizon, Somewhere up ahead, just waiting for me, Getting there means leaving things behind, Sometimes life's so bitter sweet.
I guess it's gonna have to hurt, I guess I'm gonna have to cry, And let go of some things I've loved, To get to the other side, I guess it's gonna break me down, Like falling when you try to fly, It's sad, but sometimes moving on with the rest of your life, Starts with goodbye.
2nd entry in a day..totally uncommon for mi these days and it took myself by surprise as well. I had wanted to tweet but no matter hw i tried to edit, it just couldnt fit in the limited no of words. As such, I decided to share sumtink wonderful that I just read via my blog instead.
"It happens to everyone as they grow up. You find out who you are and what you want, and then you realize that people you've known forever don't see things the way you do. So you keep the wonderful memories, but find yourself moving on."
"Life, he realize, was much like a song. In the beginning there is mystery, in the end there is confirmation, but it's in the middle where all the emotion resides to make the whole thing worthwhile."
This time round, I m giving my 1 best shot. For better or for worse, at least I know i hv really tried. I no longer wana hide behind my safety net, so im coming out to say, loud n clear of what i want.
Question is, does anyone hear mi?
Then again, it doesnt really matters. Im nearing what I intend to accomplish. When I do, everytink else will be left behind.
This is the 1st time I'm blogging via my phone. I tink I'm kinda high. Frm the effects of alcohol n the slping pills I took last nite. Who cares a damn anw? But nope, I'm not committing suicide. Y shd it? Life's too short to die over unworthy pple ya?
But nevertheless, that doesn't means we wouldn't b upset. Devastatingly upset over the unworthy. Then again, guess wat? The unworthy wouldn't n bothered, much lest read tis post.
So, let's burn it. Burn it all, unworthy pple, unworthy memories.
Okiez, Im blogging cos Im feeling damn bored nw. Am on mc tdy cos i hv this humongous swell on my leg.
I noe u guys mayb tinking Im such a paranoid freak. Fancy getting a mc becos of a damn swell. But Im not taking any chances cos the last time I had such a swell, which was aft i came back frm BKK almost exactly a yr ago, it spreaded so badly that i tot i will end up hving leprosy.
In anycase, this is not the gist of tdy's blog. Rather, I want to whine more abt my recent expenditures which really got outta hand. =(
Sat
Food: $50
Drinks: $140
Clothes: $165
Mon
Clothes: $250
Tues:
Hair: $225
Wed:
Dinner: $52
FYI. These r merely some of the bigger ticket items I can tink of at this point of time. I have not even included other misc stuff such as those frivolous shopping, transport, food n etc.
All in all, I just wana say..IM SO DAMN BROKE.
N oh, it just dawned on me that I have tons of credit card bills unsettled yet, including the payment of my Europe tour package.
Time has whizzed past so quickly again and tdy is alrdy the 6th day of the brand new yr.
Pardon me for the incoherent post that u r reading right nw.
My mind is almost a complete blank. Half of my brain cells r killed by the dreadful flu virus that I picked up 2 days ago. Hopefully, the "assortment" of medicine I hv taken earlier will help to revive my brain cells soon.
Meanwhile, the remaining half of my braincells were prob frozen to death when I was in Europe.
Oh yes, I just came back yesterday from my trip and I had celebrated my Xmas n New Yr in Europe, which is 1 of the main highlights for 2010. Once i find the mood n time, i will try to recap abt some of the other highlights n major events for 2010.
Okie, i guess that's abt all for this 1st post of 2011.
So, i finally bade farewell to those precious memories of 3.5yrs. It wasnt an easy decision at all. It's beyond words for me to pen down my emotions for the place, for the people.
I rem writing in an entry previously, albeit in a different context.
"A goodbye is never really a goodbye, unless we r never going to say hello again."
